Helping someone with Anxiety

This is a topic I feel is underplayed in today's society, whereas the actual Disorder of Anxiety is more known about, which is good. How are people supposed to know how to help and cope with someone who has Anxiety.

Everyone is born with different levels of anxiety. Some have it in a very minimal level and others have it to extreme. My whole family minus my dad are very anxious people but only one of my sisters have it to the extreme level. It has been brought to my attention very recently that anxiety can very easily control a person’s life in the worst ways. My sister, who is 4 years older than myself suffers pretty badly with the disorder, she has booked a vacation in 2 weeks time to Athens. Now I do not know about any of you guys here, but a 2 week holiday to sunny Athens sounds like bliss to me and I would be super excited for it! But for my sister, it is a completely different story. She is so nervous for it that she has cried herself to sleep every night for the past month and it will probably continue this way until she has actually gone. Now, the question arises for me in that, how is this possible? Why is she so disheartened by the fact that she will be going away on a vacation?

There are a few reasons which spring to my mind here.

1 She is worried about sunburn

2 She is worried about the flight

3 She is worried that she won’t like the food

4 She is worried that the apartment will not be as amazing as it is advertised

Not once did I start to wonder if it was because of her anxiety, but after talking about it with her for a few days now, she had described how she was feeling to a tee, so I could completely understand the issues she faces. Well, maybe not completely but I could see where she was coming from. And when asked why she was so upset about this upcoming holiday, she could not fathom why this was the case, it was just her anxiety screwing up the build up to the holiday, which is always such a good part!

She has described her anxiety to bring about the same feeling as when you are walking down a street and you accidentally trip up on a kerb and you are about to fall but regain your footing just in time and save yourself the embarrassment of a public face plant. Or when you swing on your chair and the back legs fall back just ever so slightly too much and you are about to fall backwards but you just catch yourself in time? Yeah, that cold-sweat, panicked, hair-on-the-neck-rising experience is a constant feeling for my sister and other anxiety sufferers and I could think of nothing worse.

It is with this description that I feel I can relate to her because sometimes I get that feeling even when the actual falling does not occur. I do not have it constantly like my sister but I do get it when certain events crop up in my life.

Anyways, without getting too much further into the description of anxiety, it is important for sufferers to understand that they are not alone and that those who do not suffer it at such an extreme level are there to help and support them. In fact, it is VITALLY important to enable them this comfort.

If you are someone who has just learned that a loved one or friend is suffering from this disorder, get in there and support support support. While anxiety may never completely disappear, it can be controlled with the correct help.

My tips for helping those with the disorder based on my experiences with my sister are as follows

1- It is not always something that a sufferer will want to openly discuss with you- it's a sensitive topic and discussing it comes with perhaps more anxious feelings because they do not want to be construed as being weird, so its crucially important to let them know that you are there to talk if they want to, but do NOT pressure them into talking about it and do NOT patronise someone for having anxiety.

2- Do not question their feelings. If someone is feeling anxious, try to refrain from asking them why, as quite often they themselves do not understand why they are feeling this way and it can lead to frustration.

3- Do not feel the need to bring up their anxiety during a random unrelated discussion as it can remind someone of those feelings when they may be feeling positive and comfortable at that moment.

4- Do not tell someone how to feel or how to help themselves. "if you do this, it will all get better", just be supportive and understanding and do not use yourself as an example. Life is so different for someone who suffers anxiety to an extreme level.

5- While is is so important for you to be there to support and help a sufferer through their anxiety, do NOT forget that you too will have a level of it and should not neglect your own problems as they will grow and grow and grow.

That about sums up my tips for being there to help someone with this disorder… in fact I should not really say disorder… what this post reminded me of when writing it was that many superheroes and movie characters have something that they need to control. Think of Elsa from Frozen… she had that disastrous power of turning things to ice and coldness but with time she learned to control it and she made beautiful objects and snowmen which came to life! So all you anxiety sufferers out there- stay saving our land. You’re all beautiful.

Monday Student hack!- How to survive deadline week(s)

We have all been there.... High School, College and University the likes!
We have all had the pressure of having a deadline for work... and in the UK we are very time sequential and have to have strict timely measures in place to ensure society is rolling on positively. 

I currently have 8 deadlines for the next two weeks, sadly they are mostly on the same days ie i have three deadlines to hand in on Wednesday next week. 

I thankfully do not have any exams this semester but instead my uni have decided to hump me with deadlines :))))

So to survive... or my manual to survive the deadline week, otherwise known as the Apocalypse.

1) SLEEP!!! do not go out... I know the temptation is HUGE but it is so much better to get all your work done and out the way. Of course, you can look forward to the idea that when you are done your deadlines you can get as drunk/ pished/ trollied/ tabled as you like and dance like a maniac. But seriously guys, sleep is your friend... its your guardian angel. How good and underrated is sleep? Sleep loves me and I love sleep.

When your friends are calling you names for not coming out because you are "whipped" by your uni, you can laugh at them knowing that they will end up with early wrinkles and bad livers while you welcome your friend, sleep into bed with you. 

2) MAKE A TO-DO LIST!!! this might be the Monica Geller that possesses me here, but I love completing lists. I love making lists... I love the very being of lists. Just organizing your time into slots to get something done. It makes it clear and concise... and if you want, you can colour code your Freedom times to make it more fun. 

3) SPOTIFY IS YOUR FRIEND!!! so spotify has this wonderful category called Genre... You can listen to the most chilled out music while you work and you actually can be so much more productive. Actually, as a researched article i read recently, by listening to music that is played in the background of games such as Super Mario Bros will help your productivity because it is tuned to make you concentrate on whatever you are doing. And while I can never say I have tried this, it makes perfect sense and I would like to try it at some point. 

4) GET A CALENDAR AND MARK DOWN ALL OF YOUR DEADLINES FOR EACH MODULE!!! this is a huge main chunk of deadlines... if you miss them... you are pretty much screwed. But if you make sure that you have a date to work to then you may get along better! So organize yourself at the beginning so you know what to work for and when to have things in place. Trust me, this will make your life less confusing.

5) ORGANISE A NIGHT OUT FOR AFTER ALL OF YOUR DEADLINES!!! if you have something to look forward to you can force yourself to get things done quickly and efficiently. By having this celebratory night out for when you have finished all of your deadlines you may actually work faster and be more positive. Because if you succeed or screw it all up you will be able to drink and party. And what student doesn't love that?

6) PERHAPS WAIT TO ORGANISE A NIGHT OUT FOR AFTER YOUR DEADLINES!!! this could also be a counter-productive move. I was supposed to be studying for one of my many exams in Germany in early January but got too wrapped up in my Birthday party plans... I spend most of studying time organising and buying things for an Alice in Wonderland themed birthday party. The theme alone took about 2/3 days to come up with. So just ensure that if you are making plans for after your deadline week(s) you are not taking away too much time to study and write. 

7) TAKE BREAKS DURING EACH DAY!!! I cannot stress how important this is to you. I Tried so many days in Germany not having dinner because I just did not have the time for it. This was partly due to the fact that I had left things to the last minute and had to rush to finish things, which is also terrible... but we are not talking about me here... Just 15 minutes per hour and a half worked can reassemble the brain and help you focus more. 

8) HARVARD REFERENCING IS A BITCH SO USE AN ONLINE GENERATOR!!! Neils toolbox is the best thing in the world. I mean seriously, it is a life saver. http://www.neilstoolbox.com/index.htm is the link, you will want to visit it to get these annoyances out of the way!

9) TRY NOT TO WORRY ABOUT WHAT PARAGRAPH OR QUESTION YOUR FRIENDS ARE ON!!! Just because they seem to be further on that you does not mean that they are going to get a greater mark. You could be taking your time with your work but that does not in any way mean that you are passing by less than your friend. Or failing. However, if they are finished their work and you have not started yet, you should probably get your finger out (ew) and get on with you work quickly. 

10) DO NOT STRESS!!! after having years of strict deadlines, it is important to know that you should not get too stressed out about these things. Seriously, being stressed will cause mistakes. If you ever feel like you're getting to the point where you are saying "I cannot do this" then that means you are stressed. De-stress by taking a breath, go for a run, take the dog out a walk. You need to take a break and get your thoughts together.

And most importantly, MAKE SURE YOU GET THESE DEADLINES DONE!

getting them finished earlier than you require is excellent. 

Good luck City cats and I hope you pass everything well!

Tuesday's Haul is Full of Grace

Hello dudes,

How are we all today?
Well, I have had a very productive day today. I hope you all had a splendid Easter Weekend, and that you're all doing sit ups now after eating copious amounts of chocolate... but if you're not doing sit ups because you're currently eating your Easter chocolate, then please... carry on. Personally, I was not up to much this Easter weekend. My boyfriend was working Saturday and Sunday so I was rather lonely, but I had netflix to chill with until I went back to my hometown to see my family on Sunday. I was working on Monday- which was HELL. SO busy and warm outside AND inside. It was dreadful. But I am very glad that it is over.

So my friend is currently living in Paris until the end of May and wants me to come and visit her in May at some point. I may be starting two jobs in May but hopefully that shouldnt be a problem. I gotta make dough some how, and I can really do with Parisian sun and atmosphere. I was planning to go to Paris for a couple of nights and travel to Cannes afterwards for a couple of nights and then head back to sunny old Scotland. But we shall see how things turn out.
I have not been on a holiday as such for a very long time, in fact, since 2011! That was 4 years ago, crikey.

I will take this opportunity to equip myself for the coming trip, which I started to do today after going to University to be productive and all that.
This is Tuesday's Haul. I mainly shopped in TK Maxx and Forever 21.
Forever 21 was some cheeky lingerie, I'm really into bralette, non-padded bras, with a waist cover. I am not sure if I am describing that properly.

Tuesday's Haul is full of grace

In Forever 21, I bought this sports bra, which lets be honest will just be worn to keep comfortable when watching netflix.

        This is my eh sports bra, which i'm actually going to rename to my Netflix and popcorn bra.

I really love this shirt, I was originally looking for the same thing but in burnt orange to go with a black pencil skirt. But alas, I could not find one and settled for the cream one, which is just as beautiful. Very simple and so comfortable. - TK Maxx (£12.99)

This top is so casual but so cute, and I adore the embroidery at the top. I think it looks a little bit greek like. I bought it mainly because it went so well with my favourite purchase just below from here...

(TK Maxx £9.99)

A Pleated Sugarcrush skirt. It is beautiful. I saw it and had that moment... you know the moment that I'm talking about- the beauty Gasp! My hips are those which are very child bearing, much to my dismay and usually I cannot get away with wearing these types of skirts but this one was too perfect to pass up. So i adopted the skirt. For 9.99. Yes, you read that correctly, nine pounds and ninety nine pennies. 

Today was certainly very successful for holiday shopping! And I hope you liked my pictures. A haul will be kept for Tuesdays so that you can get a happy post. Because who isn't super happy when they spend their hard earned pennies on things that offer beauty?

I hope I can book flights to Paris soon, as I can now not not go now that I have myself half equipped. 

Thank you for reading my post loves! Until Thursday! 

Ciaow city cats

xoxo

Return from the neverland

Yo dude!

How have you been? Where have you been? I have not been a anywhere else other than here... what is your excuse?

Nah, kidding on. Obviously. So here is a little catch up in the life of Emma!

I have returned for the final time to Glasgow from Berlin. I packed up and moved on home! My exams finished February 19th and I left the day after. It was a very emotional and surreal few last days in Berlin. Germany was such a huge part of my life and it was suddenly over... just like that! I loved it so much, without fully knowing how much i loved it and I slightly regret being homesick all those times, because now im home, and im sick of it and wish to return for a few days. 

Its true what they said you know,

"The home you live in really becomes you"

Okay so nobody really ever said that... ever... because it does not make much sense, but I think you can catch my drift. Travelling is a way of the mind and an escape for the heart. It either becomes you or breaks you.
I felt that during my time travelling away from home, it broke me. In some ways I still feel that is true because I have never felt the same way that I felt before embarking on my German adventure. However, maybe that is a good thing... maybe its great! In fact lets just conclude this and say it was a fabulous thing to happen to me. Obviously, distance for that long can take its toll on a beautiful relationship with a loved one, but I feel like everything is back to normal after a bumpy few visits and arrivals at home. Now I am thankful for how Berlin has taught me to deal with issues in everyday life.
Travelling teaches you so much stuff. It teaches you how fucked up your accent and slang is, it also teaches you all about yourself, and how much patience you have.

Anyways, there is me drifting off on a tangent. 

SO I arrived back at home and moved straight in with my boyfriend. We had to find a new flat due to complications with our previous letting agent... 

So we found this marvellous top floor flat, with a beautiful view of a park which is within walking distance to a cost effective supermarket and fast food outlet. Its a very small but cosy flat and we just need to take time to adjust its current level of homeliness until its perfect... the fungshui is all wrong and I need it to be balanced.

SO now I am 2 weeks away from completing 3rd year of University. One more year left... one more crazy, super stress-filled year left and then I am finished education. Scary scary thought. 

there was a lacking of pictures and I believe that a blog post is not complete without at least one picture... so here have my face and enjoy it! :)

Stay tuned in for an amazing budget-friendly student-friendlier recipe for lunch/snacktime Bruschetta!

Ciaow for now city cats!

xoxo

Update

Hellooooooooo ladies and Gentlemice

So Happy new year!! Welcome to Emma's first 2015 blog post! let me tell you..
It has already been an interesting year indeed. I had returned to Berlin after my Christmas break and had been feeling very homesick. I was not feeling Berlin quite as i used to and it was leaving a bad taste in my mouth.
Lets start with the first big thing that happened to me in Berlin in 2015. I LEFT MY TEENAGE YEARS BEHIND.



But not to fret, I had an excellent birthday with some awesome people who did this for me...

We went out at the night to a really apt club for me and those people... Clubs in Berlin are amaaaaazing if you are with the right people. The majority of clubs in Berlin are created under Techno influence... ie music with no lyrics. Don't get me wrong, it's great but I really could not live in a city where that was the only genre of clubs available. Oh, wait a minute... I did! :O FOR 6 MONTHS! :O But we went to the E4S club in Potsdamer Platz.... right up my street!
We had a Mustafa's Kebab in the afternoon of my bday, which was excellent as usual! :) Im really beginning to hate myself as I have not taken enough pictures of my time in Berlin and I cannot show you how happy my face is when im with a Mustafa's Gemuse Kebab! But it is something like :D

Anyways so that was my Bday over with. Sad because I couldn't spend it with my family or Boyfriend but happy because I could spend my time with some incredibly awesome people in the best way possible!

My parents had come over for the week last week which was awesome! And we had all booked the same flights over to home again, unknowing of when they were booking their flight. Turns out we were all on the same exact flight just a seat away from each other! what are the chances...
When we got home to Sunny Scotland (I say that metaphorically because it never fricking sunshines here) (is sunshines a word) we drove home from the airport. Arrived at my family home in my small hometown and my sister was awaiting me with a surprise!

An Alice in Wonderland themed Birthday cake! It was absolutely incredible. My sister is a professional cake artist and she has made some astonishing, jaw-dropping cakes before! I shall do a segment on those cakes at some point! This was not only a random theme of birthday cake btw... I was planning to throw an Alice in Wonderland themed Birthday party at my new flat with my boyfriend. I made loads of decorations, and the place looked super wonderlandy!

I was obviously Alice. I had purchased a blue strapless dress from a European shop called Pimkie (such an awesome shop), some stripey black and mesh tights from Primark, a blue hair extension clip (poundland) and that was my alice look. I had also used blue makeup and curled my hair to make myself look more mad.

"drink me" tags for a straw

one of my many arrows 

There were many other decorations which I hand made but I will have to take a picture of them hoping my boyfriend has not already removed them! The party was soo fun! Saw so many people I had not seen in a loooong time, which made it that much better!

Anyways, to keep you uptodate about whats going on, I am having to return to Berlin on the 8th of February to sit three exams. I will be staying there until the 20th of February and then I move back home to Glasgow. I am frantically looking for a job as I am absolutely poor beyond all words. Where does money go?

Thanks for reading this rather lengthy blog post! I appreciate you.

Loveeee,

Emma

ciaow city cats

xoxo

10 things that annoy me

Hi lovelies! :)

SO after the Christmas period of the holidays, I decided to write a little blog post about the things that annoy the living crap out of me, and I hope you will find some that annoy you too so we can relate and basically be best friends.



1) When you're making a word document and trying to make it all pretty by putting images and photos on it and no matter what kind of image frame you use, be it Square or Behind Text it does the opposite of what you want. It goes everywhere else on the page other than the exact place you want it to go. Even wipes out some of your text and important words. I mean what is that? Come on Microsoft, get your shit together.

2) Skinny people who make fun of bigger people who are working out to lose their problem weight. They are trying and you are knocking them down because it makes you feel better about your other insecurities. You haven't had the struggle of gaining weight over a period of time and trying to get rid of it to better yourself. UGH.

3) It really irritates me that some people who are beautiful can be really horrible inside. I think that it should be the case that however beautiful you are on the inside it should show on the outside. ie a beautiful person on the inside should be beautiful on the outside. It is not fair that people are given the benefits of life by being beautiful on the outside but nasty cretins on the inside.

4) That you can't use a normal pencil sharpener to sharpen eye liner (UGH FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS)

5) That to get anywhere in life, you need money

6) People on Tumblr who claim to be depressed and that they cut themselves. Yo, knowing someone who has been in that position before, it is a fact that those legit depressed people DO NOT want to talk about what they are going through. So these bitches who sit there and complain about it on the internet to other people are those people who PISS ME OFF. Stop "cutting" and pluck those eye brows instead. Its a great way to hurt yourself without actually endangering your life. I understand that some people do require the internet as a means to offload but those people who literally take pictures of their cuts or they make art or words out of the scrapes and scars need to signed up for an appointment to be seen by a Doctor because they have the case of "being a little bitch" which can be cured by a swift slap across the face so that their vision is not just secured by the thoughts of "me me me" and it can actually allow them to see what the real problems of the world are. This is in no offence to those people who are genuinely depressed and suffer in day to day life... I'm just calling those out who do offend them and actually make fun of their situation by splurting it all over the internet.

7) That Nandos don't offer the black card to anyone who is not a celebrity. I think that is so rude because I am what gives them 98% of their business. And they never pay me back. RUDE Nandos... Rude.

8) I hate doing a workout on carpeted flooring. I don't know why, I just hate hate hate it. I feel so slow and I'm fearful of the dreaded carpet burn.

9) When people are talking to me and all I want to do is walk away from boredom but they won't stop talking... OMG JUST SHUTUP!

10) When people are ungrateful for things that I go out my way to do.

These are the things I hate in life. And currently I am going through not being able to write two words without having to stop and say a few words to someone... that is also something that annoys the bejeeezuz out of me.
Anyways I hope you can relate and that I'm not just a very irritable person haha


Ciaow
xoxox

Merry Kissmass!

Hello lovelies! :)
So today is Christmas day, are you singing out loud for all to hear to spread Christmas cheer?
I have had the most magnificent Christmas so far... for reasons I cannot explain yet on social networking because nobody else knows about it in my family so until they know, you cannot know I'm afraid... don't take it personally I just cannot risk my family seeing it!

So what did you all get from Santa? I got nail polish, scarves upon scarves, straighteners, chocolates, jewellery and a NANDOS KIT! As I've been living in Berlin, I have been extremely deprived of a Nandos! Me and my wonderful boyfriend usually go every two weeks at least and get the yummiest chicken dinner, so living in a country where Nandos does not exist is quite literally terrible. #firstworldproblems right?

If you have never had a Nandos before... get yourself to your closest branch and eat away your piri piri virginity.

 This was the Christmas cake that myself and my talented sister had made. I made the snowman with the blue hat and scarf and she did the rest. It was a gift for my Granny and Granddad and they appeared to have loved it.

My table Layout... spot Frosty the snowman if you can!

Napkin Christmas Trees made by me... if you'd like to know how I made these, I can make a tutorial

Isn't this just the cutest ornament ever?

I had made the table layout this year... needs an iron over but I enjoyed creating it.
How were your Christmas table layouts lovelies?
I hope you all have the most magical wonderful Christmas this year! After a huge freak accident that occurred in Glasgow on Monday this week, it has made everybody I know really care about spending their day with family and loved ones as it just goes to show how life cannot be guessed. My heart goes out to every single family member or friend that knew those who were lost in the tragic bin lorry accident, and I'm praying for them.

Have a great Christmas and I'll see you all next blog post! :)

Ciaow for now, and merry Kissmass.

xoxox